Kristen: 0:36

Hey everyone, welcome back. I am so excited today to have my friend Tiffany on here. Tiffany, I've known each other for a while and she has so many cool things. She's one of the coolest people I know and I'm so excited that she agreed to do this and talk about all the super cool stuff she has going on. Hi Tiffany.

Tiffany: 0:55

Hi, I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for inviting me on the show. I can't wait.

Kristen: 1:01

Yes, so for people who don't know you, can you give us a little introduction of who Tiffany is?

Tiffany: 1:08

Yeah, absolutely. So my name is Tiffany Patterson. I am a certified natural health professional, a transformational life coach, and I'm an angelic reiki master teacher. And I'm also part of the sacred priesthood. I actually did a priestess walk in Colorado for a year and a half. And one of the big things that I just really focus on is, just overall complete women wellness. And it takes all kinds of different layers and levels. We look at the energy side of things, the spiritual side of things, physical, mental, financial, all of the wellnesses you can think of. You can't have one without the other. And if any one of them is out of balance, you're all out of balance. I focus on all of that. And in that shell and just really helping women, shift back from feeling stuck and disconnected and exhausted until a place where they are fully aligned, deeply embodied, and just absolutely thriving. So I'm so excited to be here. And I'm like, really excited to start diving in and conversations with you.

Kristen: 2:09

Yeah. And like, all of that is so exciting, because I feel like that's where I've been so often. And I think so many of the listeners have to is just that stuck There's no other way for it. Like we're surviving, we're getting through, but getting to that next level of actually thriving, I think is something that so many people long for, but they don't know how to attain it on their own.

Tiffany: 2:32

Yeah, absolutely. And that's one of the biggest things and I work with women and men and kids, but I mainly focus with women because there's just been this huge movement, especially after the pandemic that, we really realize that we weren't in control of. What we thought we were in control of and there's a lot of, things of us being told of what is acceptable, what's not acceptable, what we should be doing. And, all of these standards and it's they're not even ours and they're so outdated that they don't even support us anymore. And so I feel like I'm that, that disturber, like I'm that disruptor that everybody never knew they needed because I'm like, no, I'm going to call you out on your stuff. And I'm like, and I'm, I feel like I'm very sweet and loving when it comes to coaching. It's listen, I'm going to tell you what it is. I'm going to call you on your stuff because somebody has to bring this awareness into you. Our lenses into our field so that we can understand Yeah, this is what we've been taught to do. And there's no wrong in that. But as we continue to evolve as a human race, we also need to involve, evolve all of the things that support us. And we just haven't done that. And so that's the thing that I like to do is I like to be that disruptor into people's lives and saying, Hey, you know what? Is this even yours? If you had the choice, is this what you would actually choose or would you choose something different? And that's the tough love that people really need to start pushing through and also realizing what is an alignment for us and what isn't an alignment for us. And I think that's one of the hardest pieces of my job, but also one of the most. gratifying things because whenever I see people like understand and it just clicks, their growth and their healing and their wellness just skyrocket. And it's a beautiful thing to watch.

Kristen: 4:17

I love that. Now, can we take a step back and talk about how you got into this, and you've got all the different titles, your life coaching and your Reiki, all the stuff you have. How did it start? What made you interested? What came first and led to the other? Could you take a couple minutes and lead us through your story that got you to here?

Tiffany: 4:37

Yeah. So what's actually really funny is I was born and raised in a Southern Baptist church, like anybody around here, most people have been to church or No, and understand just how the church works, functions and processes. And so at a very young, early age, I always knew I was different. I could feel and sense things that other people couldn't. I could hear and see things that other people couldn't. And whenever I was bringing it up to my family and to, my mentors and church, the, a lot of the things I was. basically told to was we don't talk about that. Or, it's not really something that's, we don't do that. That's not of God was like the biggest thing that I got.

Kristen: 5:21

That's not biblical. That's not biblically

Tiffany: 5:24

sound. Exactly. And, and I'm not shaming my family or my church or anything like, I love them all to death, but I'd never had that support. And so I actually hid myself, my talents for a really long time until I turned 18 and I decided to abruptly leave my parents household so I can do my own thing. And I actually started with angelic mediumship because that was the thing that I knew. I could definitely hear and see things that people couldn't and I wanted to do it in a way that was still safe but also a gift because God gave me this gift for a

Kristen: 5:58

reason

Tiffany: 5:59

and how am I supposed to help support anybody or you know help people heal if I can't express that or lean into or work with. And I did go through an angelic practitioner program. I learned mediumship. I learned how to read cards and just really starting getting really good with like energy healing. And from there I went into Reiki, which wasn't exactly my cup of tea. I actually hated it. Wow. But I started doing a little bit more research and I found Angelic Reiki. And so I traveled to Colorado because I was the closest practitioner. And I actually took little baby Raya. She was probably two or three years old. And little Xavier was only a few months old. He wasn't even walking yet. And we loaded up in the car, did a 13 hour drive out there. I got certified. We went back the next month. I continued my certification for three straight days to become a master teacher. So then I can bring it back here to Missouri as the first Angelic Reiki practitioner and teacher. And I started teaching and doing all that stuff here, which then just continued to lead into my, naturopathy during the pandemic because I wanted to look more holistically versus chemically. And then we got into all the other things like the coaching and homesteading and just living our lives.

Kristen: 7:15

Oh my gosh, I love that so much. And it's interesting how one thing led to another and led to another to where you are now with all the stuff you have going on.

Tiffany: 7:26

Yeah, it was really interesting because after I did my first attunement. As a master and just traditional Reiki, I actually started seeing these really cool symbols. And I actually have it tattooed on my arm now and I kept drawing them over and over again. And I took it back to my Reiki master and I was like, Hey, what are these symbols? I can't find them anywhere. And she goes, honestly, I've never seen them before. So I actually started looking into them some more and I learned that they were called Zaibu symbols. Okay. And they're angelic symbols. And I started looking into the angelic, like meaning and everything. And that's how I came across the angelic Reiki. And I knew I wanted it and we didn't know how we were going to make it happen, but we did. And it has been such a life changing thing. I actually went up to Canada after doing a in depth two year program of just called the disruptor

Kristen: 8:14

code,

Tiffany: 8:15

which is really similar to the naturopathy that I've been learning and working with as well, but it's brought more in. Of like the energetic of like anatomy and things like that, which I thought was just super fascinating. And so I do a nice blend of all of it.

Kristen: 8:30

That is so cool. Do you see common themes that women have, or can you tell us what some of the common themes are that you see over and over with women? Yeah.

Tiffany: 8:41

Yeah, so I have to say the thing I see the most is women know they want more. They know that there's something starting there's something new there's got to be something that is More to life than what we have right now and it's nothing wrong with that because even people who are very highly successful they get to a point where At some point, they still want to continue to thrive. They still want to continue to grow, or they just want to shake things up a little bit. And so a big thing that gets in our own way is our own self sabotage. We start getting ourselves overwhelmed because of all the information overload. And we're just like, Trying to do all the things at once instead of breaking it down into more manageable pieces, or we allow society to just basically break us. I think is the biggest thing and we don't follow through. And so it's not that we're failing at what we're trying to do. It's just, we're not finding that right. State that we need to put ourselves in so that our bodies feel safe. They get out of that fight or flight mode so that we can actually start being more in tune with ourselves. Because when you're constantly stressed out or worried about things or just not allowing ourselves to slow down and process and heal, our bodies are constantly in that fight or flight mode. And it's never a, it's never allowed to actually reset. Okay. And if we're not letting our bodies reset, then it's not balancing like it needs to, or healing like it needs to, which is where we're going to start seeing the chronic pain, the stress, the unbalanced hormones, the physical, just Exhaustion that we're constantly feeling on a day to day base. And then we're drowning ourselves a coffee all the time and coffee actually feels more of that. Then what it would if we would actually take the time to do more water or do, Something that like protein is really like the biggest thing that we need to do. And a lot of people just don't do that. Not that coffee is that I love my coffee, but there's a difference between a cup or two of coffee and two or three puffs of coffee. And so Those are the kinds of things that we just have to start being more mindful about.

Kristen: 10:58

So I feel very called out by everything you just said. But it's because I think I'm that target audience, like the exhaustion, both mentally, physically I feel like I'm always stressed. I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, but I feel like I have some version of adult ADHD. When my brain is always going 5, 000 times a minute, like I can't ever shut it off. And it is always fight or flight because I'm like scared of something and not like physically ah, there's a lion going to eat me. But all the other things that are going on, the anxiety that builds, but then feeds the stress, which then makes me more nervous, which You know, I can feel it through my whole body and yeah, the coffee is a for real thing. I know I'm drinking a lot of it, probably too much, but at the same time it is, it's I don't do drugs. I don't do a lot of alcohol. Like for me, like the caffeine is where I get my boost yay, I feel good. Life is good. This is wonderful. But that's just, it's almost just covering up like it's a bandaid. Like it's something that kind of goes over everything else and it's not getting me anywhere. But what I want to talk about from everything you said, aside from me being convicted, because I clearly have all the things wrong. You mentioned society, and I want to pull this thread a little bit longer, because I'm curious some of the things that you think society is doing against women, because I have all these theories where, We see mean girl culture, which I believe is still very huge. Even in adult women lives, there's always women talking about other women, tearing them down and it's almost acceptable. Like people just Oh yeah, mean girl mentality, whatever. And it's not something that's actually done it, but there's also the different society, working moms. It's great to be a working mom, but make sure you're still making time for your family and you're doing all these other things and you can have it all, but you still have to do it all. And there's a lot of those things. is still expected. So I'm curious in your words, what do you think are some of the biggest pressures that society is putting on women?

Tiffany: 12:54

Yeah, and this is probably not the best movie to quote, but this reminds me of this speech and Barbie where she's talking about literally this, like we're expected to be this person and this person that can't be too fat or too thin or too, it has this just picture perfect what it's supposed to look and feel like as a woman and as a mom. It's not even it's not even real, the perfection is an illusion because what I see perfect versus what you or somebody else would see as perfect are completely two different things. And so we're chasing perfectionism and it's not even a thing, it's a complete illusion. And so I think the biggest thing that I struggled with society was that. You have to work a nine to five job in order to be successful. You have to go to school and college in order to be successful. You have to, do all of these different things. And it's instead of the system supporting us, I feel like it's trying to break us more than anything. Do I believe in Western medicine? Absolutely. If I'm in a car accident, you best believe you're strapping my butt in an ambulance and taking me to a hospital. However, if my kids are struggling with, let's talk about all of these sick kids here lately. You don't need to keep putting all of these crazy medications and things in their bodies. There's a way to naturally get them out of it. So Xavier actually, for example, ended up he's. My sweet boy for those of you guys who don't know he's seven and a half and he ended up with influenza A. And if you've known anybody who has currently recently got the influenza A, it is a doozy this year. And I have seen grown adults who have been wiped out for almost 17 plus days. Oh my gosh. And so whenever I learned that he got it, he's already immune compromised with his asthma. His little lungs just got over the whole walking pneumonia thing that he ended up with in January. So my mind, I just, I lost it because I'm like, Oh my gosh, this is not good.

Kristen: 14:52

And so

Tiffany: 14:52

I went to my, so I'm actually got some indigenous blood. My great grandma was since a Cherokee Indian. And so I busted out one of these books that my grandma gave me of just like indigenous home remedies. And one of the things that they had for the flu was to chop up onions. Stick them in your sock and let them sleep with the onions and their socks overnight. And I'm not kidding you, he would literally rent from a miserable child with body aches, 105 fever, couldn't keep his head up, didn't have any strength to hardly get off the couch to go to the bathroom, to a kid that we couldn't get to sit down. Wow. he had it for less than three days. No fever, we were able to break the fever that once he was diagnosed, I started doing the home treatment and I'm not saying this is going to work for everybody, because everybody's bodies are different. But he didn't need to have all the antibiotics and all the things. I actually didn't prescribe him anything because it's a virus like you can't do anything for that. And it's just being mindful that there's more healthier supportive ways to support our bodies even whenever we have these difficult viruses that are going around that doesn't include us just having to push the medication or You know the other thing too is You It's so complicated and getting the things that we need just as far as like the food and everything's, Prices are changing and everything's shifting and all this stuff and it's all fear tactic And that's what I can't stand about this like the way that society sets up all these Expectations is it's so fear driven. They don't want us to not be fearful of something or another. It's a control tactic. It is. And and I love the church, but it's similar to the whole fear of God thing too. When I was growing up, it was like, Oh, don't do that. Cause you're going to go to hell or you can't do this because it goes against God and you're not going to get into heaven. And Oh, I was always fear tactics. And so whenever I was able to just step back and be like, okay, if we look at all of this in a different way, because I'm very much still a very strong Christian, I think my faith is stronger now that I've ever been. It literally is just looking at what you're being told and then Is it actually truth to you or is there some other way that truth is going to support you in a different manner? Yeah. And so that was the thing that I loved the most about all of this.

Kristen: 17:16

Yeah, and I think it's so important to be able to have your own belief system and understanding why you believe it I recently was talking my friend Alexis about purity culture and I know you're a little bit younger than I am But you probably grew up in the same thing true love waits and we were all terrified to not know do anything, because Oh, you're gonna go to hell if you do this before marriage and all this stuff. And Alexis and I were talking the same point you just brought up, there was so much fear tactics. And that's what they were using to scare us to keep us in line to follow the quote unquote rules. And it's crazy that once you are an adult, and you look back at and you're like, wow, they were messed up and how they were doing I believe their hearts were in the right places. And the intentions were there. And they were trying to, raise children the way they thought. They were supposed to in a biblical fashion, but it's just how it was Pushed towards people missed that and I think messed us up a lot along the way

Tiffany: 18:10

Yeah, and I totally agree and I think that's the big thing too is if we don't understand something and this is just Like our, like human race in general. If we don't understand something, we fear it. We don't give it the opportunity to show us, is it going to help us? Is it going to support us? Is it going to hurt us? I've been doing energy work since back in 2010, 2011, but it did not get popular until probably the past year or two. And if you went to any of the coast, you can go to East coast, West coast, didn't matter if you went to a coast. They were thriving with energy healers. That's why I was going all the way out to Colorado when I first really dove into this. It's because there were no other practitioners around here that offered anything like what I wanted, which was that angelic Reiki.

Kristen: 18:59

And

Tiffany: 19:00

so that was my mission. If I wanted to bring that back here, I wanted to bring, because as Christians and as a Christian myself, having that ability to just connect to the divine energy Is a whole different level of spirituality and healing. And that's where things really started to thrive for me. And, you knew me whenever I first was at my darkest, my lowest, we were in the pandemic, pregnant with twins, had the twins. It wasn't even four months later, became guardians of my special needs. This is My health was crap. It was so bad. My mental, like my mental health was bad. It was just awful. And it took me two years to finally get to the point of where I'm at now. And it has been a very deep dive of a journey. And so that's what I love about everything that I've been working on and coaching and doing all the things is because I was that person. I was over 250 pounds, so deep in postpartum depression that I didn't even know if I wanted to stay here. Oh wow. And whenever we got to that point where I was like, I hate the person that I am. How can my husband love me? I'm just, how can my kids love me? Because I can't even move and play or do anything because I'm just so overweight. I don't have the energy. I got chronic pain. I was having to get spinal injections because the pain was so bad with my sciatica. I couldn't pick my babies up out of the bed because I was afraid my back was going to lock up and I would drop them. Like it was the darkest time of my life. And if I can go through that and be. where I'm at today, I want to share my story with women because you're not alone. There's so many women that hid their miscarriages. That was something that my husband and I battled with by ourselves. We struggled with I struggled with postpartum depression and I did that for about nine months until I finally realized like, This is actually not me. This is not who I am. And it's after I've started sharing my story, it's so many women that I personally knew, and I'm like, I had no idea. And they're like, girl, I had no idea. And I said, we need to stop hiding. We need to start sharing our stories and being truthful with each other, because that is how we're going to support each other and start thriving. But as you mentioned before, we have to stop. judging everybody because nobody honestly knows what that person is going through until they're in their shoes. And so we got to stop with these clicks. We got to stop with the Oh, my house is cooler than your house shenanigans. As long as you have a roof over your head, your family's healthy and fed, you're, happily in a marriage or happily living your life. It doesn't matter what your house looks like.

Kristen: 21:46

It

Tiffany: 21:47

matters what is happening inside that house and how everybody is living. Are they happy? Are they thriving? Are they struggling? We need to start being more open with what we have in our lap so that we can start actually healing. As an entire whole and really start just embodying that support that women are desperately craving right now. I think too. And that's the other thing that I love just helping with.

Kristen: 22:13

Yeah, and I think so much of what you're saying connects to what we were talking about earlier, too. I still think it's a society thing, too. It's like hiding it. You're talking about, I didn't know these women were going through this. They didn't know I had gone through it. Because we're told, back to what you're saying, Be perfect. Be the happy little wife, be the good little girl, nothing can be wrong with you. And I feel like there's so many of us that are like walking around masked. Like we've got them out. We get the happy face on everything's fine. Don't let anybody know anything's wrong because and then I know personally I struggle I don't want to tell anybody what's going on because they don't really care. And then it just looks like I'm complaining and I don't want to talk about what's going on and make people feel bad. And then there's the insecurities too. too. I don't want people to think I can't handle this or I don't like, I'm not in control. Like they need to think that I'm better than this, that I can do it. And I struggle with that a lot. I think that's partly why I started the podcast too. I say, talk with Kristen with an E because it's cheaper than therapy because so much I think is therapy for me too, is I'm going through things that. I learned as a young woman or thought of the insecurities I have in confronting them on my own. And, this is who I am, I've hid for so long of just trying to be what I thought everybody else wanted me to be that I lost myself along the way. And here it is, I'm 41, almost 41 and a half. And it's it's time that I can be the real me and be unashamed of who I am. Like. This is all of me and you can like me or not, but I have to get past that because I'm a really bad people pleaser too, but I've got to get past that, that I can't always worry about what people are thinking about me. But before I can get to that, I have to love myself first. And that's another piece where I think self worth is very hard. And I'm sure you've seen that with a lot of people you've worked with. So what are some of the tips or advice you give people from how to heal on the inside and rebuild their self worth? When they have lost themselves to their families, to their jobs, to society, how can you, what, how do you tell them to find themselves and connect with that?

Tiffany: 24:13

Yeah, absolutely. And you know what, this is one of my favorite things that I love just, sharing out in public or in person. But whenever I, when I came up with the whole Aligned and Thriving, like the biggest piece that I had my students or my followers do just as a test run to see how it went was, When you were a kid, what did you dream of doing when you got older? When you were in high school, what was the one thing that you remember just wanting to, focus in on what were your hobbies? What were the things that made you feel alive, that made you feel fun, that made you do all of the things that just really brought that play into your life? Because as women, the older that we get, we are and we've been focused on supporting for our kids and making sure that they're healthy and that they're thriving and, mine are fairly young. I'm finally getting out of that stage where they don't need me constantly. And so it's like I've given all of myself to them making sure that their needs are fully met but now that it's Shifting into the other role where guys still need to be there for my kids. What about myself, And I think that was the biggest thing too was Most people don't know what to do After a certain stage and like you said you're at the stage now where you're like, I want to be me I don't care what other people think of and the biggest thing that I love doing and I tell people this all the time obviously it's the perfectionism thing, but People are going to talk,

Kristen: 25:40

they're

Tiffany: 25:40

going to talk. If you're doing well, they're going to talk. If you're failing at life, not that many of us are, we just feel like we are, but regardless of what stage we're in at life, people are going to talk. So let them, let them, that's their problem, not yours. And so I am a people pleaser as well. And one of the things that I also have to teach a lot of women is when we're doing everything we can to support Friends, family, or children in a way that doesn't actually allow them to learn the process themselves or the healing that needs to be learned in that moment, in that situation, we're actually not helping them. Instead, we're causing more problems. Because they're not understanding what they need to do to get out of the situation that they're in so that they can move forward. And I think that's the hardest thing, especially as a parent, because you want to make sure your kids know, obviously what's right and wrong, how to stay safe, how to treat each other, how to treat themselves, how to treat, all the things, which I think that the foundations of the church come in really well with that, about being a good person and all the things, but. But at some point, they're going to have to start making their own life choices. And so this is where that kind of, not freedom, but the, I'm going to let you decide. And then based off of your decision, as long as they are safe, as long as they are not hurting anybody or anything or causing any harm or destruction, Let them learn from their own choices, because if we're not allowing them to make mature choices or things, then we're not actually allowing them to grow up or to learn. As humans, the 1st thing I want you guys to understand is. Take time to be by yourself for a minimum of 10 minutes. And I'm not saying hiding in the bathroom either, like actually genuinely find 10 minutes and you can either do a quick workout, you can do a meditation, you can do some breathing exercises. Stretch, go lay out in the ground and the dirt and just ground yourself out in nature. There is, there's so much that you can do in 10 minutes that will just absolutely reset your entire system, which is what we need to do. And Kristen, you actually talked about having that ADHD brain. I totally have it. And it is I have so many conversations happening in my head at one part of it. spiritual part of it, my envisa team, and part of it's just my brain not being able to shut up. But one thing that I love to do is put some headphones on. Go look for ADHD binaural beats. And just let them play, turn it up, give yourself 10 minutes. It is the most awkward thing when you first try it. Cause you're not used to your brain, not making any kind of noise inside of it. But it is the most, like your entire body will just melt. It'll melt. Like even my husband, he's I don't know what you're listening to, but this sounds great. And I'm like, dude, you should put the headphones on. It's totally different. And he's this is amazing. And I'm like, but. Do something for 10 minutes. That's going to allow you to just be you. If you're really wanting to start doing some self love, I can tell you one of the hardest things that you can do is to stand in front of a mirror, completely, just you with no clothing or anything on and allow the horrible things to come up in that as you're looking at yourself. Okay. And then once you get done doing that for about five minutes, Then do five minutes of just positive affirmations. You can find affirmations on Spotify or any kind of music. And then just really start empowering yourself and saying, you know what? No, I love my body. Guess what? My body carried two beautiful girls at the same time. My body has allowed me to have three very healthy pregnancies and it did it without any complications. My body has allowed me to do, X, Y, and Z and really start honoring and thanking our bodies, even though they might not be exactly where we want them. They've gotten us To where we're at now, and we should be grateful for that. And so just really giving that affirmation, that positive, that, Hey, thank you for what you've done for me thing. As you continue to do this practice for 30 days, your entire script on what say, and how you feel about yourself will completely shift and your confidence is going to go through the roof. And it's going to be a complete life changing thing. However, you've got to get past those first. Like week because it is uncomfortable and it's hard and it is brutal. But if you get past that first week, it gets easier from there. And once it starts getting easier from there, it's like, why didn't I start doing this before? And you guys have got to start putting more water and protein in yourselves. If you're not doing enough water and protein, it doesn't matter what kind of regimen you're doing to better your wellness or get in better shape or mental wellness or anything like that. It's got to have that extra protein and that extra water.

Kristen: 30:49

Yeah, it's true. And you say the first week is the hardest. I imagine the first five minutes is the hardest because I'm cringing. And I know, I've heard that before, go through all the things you don't like, but then talk about all the things you do Oh, I have very cute wrists. I'm very happy with my wrists. I like my earlobes. I feel like they're attached just perfectly. But being able to look at the big things. And I mean that like in real life. And it's just it's harder to get through that. And you're right. It's the affirmations. And it's, relearning the self talk. And I think that's the hardest thing.

Tiffany: 31:21

It really is. And the way that I also really encourage, the women that I coach is to start flipping the script. When you start noticing yourself really downing on whatever you're doing, how you're feeling, whatever you're working on, or even the way that you're looking or feeling, So you know what? No, that's not how I want to think or process. Like instead I'm going to delete, delete, delete. I tell my husband, destroy and uncreate that. That is not happening. We're not living that life. But just erase it and then be like, but what I do want or what I want to affirm is this instead. And so take the negative and flip it to more positive. And the other thing too is our subconscious doesn't know the difference between what's reality and what's not.

Kristen: 32:03

And

Tiffany: 32:03

so I love to tell my clients to put your head back up in the clouds, daydream, start dreaming those elaborate lives, or, those things that seem so far out of reach, because the more we start living in that brain, the more we start seeing ourselves in that space, that aspect, the more we're our reality is actually going to start shifting that because our subconscious is going to go, Oh I thought this is where we're at, but actually we're over here. I need to start focusing on this. I need to start bringing in more of this and like then we start manifesting the things that we want to manifest. And so if you catch yourself saying, you know what i'm never going to get out of debt. I'm struggling so hard I don't want to open up the bail the bills because I don't want to see what I owe x y and z be like, you know what No debt does not control me. I am going to claim this. I'm going to own this. And you know what? I'm going to crush this because I am financially abundant. I am a millionaire mama. And you know what? Believe it. If you don't have that belief behind the energy or the intentions that you're setting, then you might as well just be throwing wet noodles at the wall and seeing that they stick because you've got to have that belief that's going to be there. And if you're doubting yourself, even just a little bit, nope, destroying and create that. I don't doubt myself. I am going to make it. This happened. And so just having that belief, having that energy behind it, and then flipping the script from the negative to the positive and just reaffirming what it is you're actually wanting to do.

Kristen: 33:25

That's the thing. Cause I've heard too, especially when you're working on the self talk, talk to yourself in a way you would talk to a good friend and you're not going to say all those mean, hurtful things. Comments to a good friend, then why are you saying them to yourself and being able to switch that, like you said, delete it and change it and make it what you want it to be. And also manifesting. So this is something that I've become More aware of, probably in the past year or two. And it's because I'll say something and I know sometimes people think I'm joking, but I'm like, I'm going to manifest it and I'll sit, I'll talk about something happening or I'll talk about it's happened twice now. I've had two friends that have wanted a job and I've just talked about so and so is going to get the job like, oh, I hear they're hiring for this position. We already know so and so is going to get it. And I'm not kidding you twice. This has happened within probably the past year. And it's like you said, it's the belief and it takes it back to our biblical beginnings where, faith like a mustard seed, all things through faith are possible. And, it's, we're taught that way to believe in God, to make something happen. And I still believe that everything does happen for a greater purpose, God, universe, whatever people want to believe in. But I also think that manifesting. And saying things out loud and believing that it's going to happen and doing the work as if it has happened or will happen. I do agree that's huge. And it's I find myself, manifesting all the time now. And like I said, I know people think I'm joking because if they haven't seen it happen on their own, or it's not something that fits into their worldview or their belief system, like I get it. Everybody, is free to believe whatever they want and do whatever they want. But I have seen that. I really do believe the manifesting thing is for real.

Tiffany: 35:00

Absolutely. And I love that you said you have to see yourself there. You have to believe you're already there. But instead of saying, you know what, I'm going to be a million dollar mama one day. No, I am one. I'm already at that point. You don't have to make me try working for it or do I know that I'm that million dollar mama. And you have to put yourself in that place and you have to start saying from authority that I am this person because until you genuinely believe it yourself, you're not going to be able to manifest that you're not going to be able to make it actually come to life. If you're still stocking guessing or if you're struggling to say, one day, one day. Okay, cool. That's one day in it. It's time. The time is now the times to step up the times, to show up, start shaking things up and honestly, just not caring what other people think because it's not them who has to live your life. You have to live your life. And the other thing too, that we have to think about it, we are the examples for our children. So if our children are seeing us struggle, if our children are seeing us, have all these different things that we're, just conflicting within ourselves, what's that going to teach them, right? They're going to do the same thing. They're going to withdraw. They're going to, change what they want to do, how they act, how they believe, how they live their life so that it fits the mold to what, other people want them to be doing because that's what they saw us do, and it's I don't want to be that person. Instead, I want to be the person that shakes things up, makes you start questioning everything. So then you can start figuring out what feels in alignment for you. So then we can start thriving. And it wasn't until, like you said, you just got to stop letting other people, drive the car. And drive it yourself that we really started as a family seeing the shifts as a whole and it's been really Quite beautiful because once you start working on yourself, your kids are going to notice They're going to start doing the same thing Your partners are going to notice they're going to start doing the same things and then all the people that they're connected to And it's a beautiful ripple effect. It always reminds me of that Reach out to three people and if they touch three people and then those three people do three people and then you like, it's just a continuation of going out even further. And that's how we start making those really big shifts. Those really big movement and really just start creating. a entire lifestyle that people are genuinely craving and genuinely wanting to step into, which is why I've got the Aligned and Thriving program.

Kristen: 37:27

Yeah, which I do want you to give us all the details on that before we wrap up, but I wanted to make one other point that I thought of when you were talking about that. It is so important for us to be examples to our kids. And I have seen that too. It's so important that I don't want my son to have the same insecurities I have, I'd want him to do his own thing. But the interesting thing I've seen in my situation is that I'm actually learning it more from my son. He's the kind of person that he doesn't care what anybody thinks. You know this, he's one of the only boys in the dance class, in fact, he was the only boy for a little bit, he's got some of his friends to join, they've come and gone, and he doesn't care, and he proudly tells he was at his soccer team last year that he was on, it was a new team, and they were like, oh what other things are you involved in? And he leads with, I'm in a hip hop dance class and I play basketball. Like it, he actually went with that first. And it's, and I say that there's nothing wrong with boys dancing. It's just where we are. It's not a common thing, but he doesn't let that stop him. And there's other times like he'll mix match his shoes or his socks or whatever on his team. A few years ago, he was known as two shoes because he was always wearing two different shoes. And it's he is so secure in who he is at 11, which is not something I ever was at 11. That I am impressed and trying to follow his example of being comfortable in my own skin and who I am. So I think the point of that is that we can learn from each other. Parents leading children teaching parents, like you said partners, it's just all about. learning from everyone.

Tiffany: 38:54

Absolutely. And I love that. I love, the confidence that he has. And I do know your son and he's so sweet and I always love him because his personality is just so genuine. Kids are our mirrors. They do really great jobs at showing us the things that we need to work on ourselves. And a lot of this actually comes from our parenting too. Like, Why am I yelling at my kids over something so stupid? Like, why does it frustrate me that, they can't just take two seconds and put their shoes in the cubby hole that's right here. Like, why can't they just throw it in the laundry basket instead of on the floor next to it? Like all these things will pop up. Part of that's my ADHD. Part of it is the fact that I am very particular and controlling because of my ADHD I can see ten steps ahead of everybody else But I'm like you're slowing me down because now I'm having to go back Yeah, and so my kids and my husband are so amazing at like This is triggering the F out of me right now. Why? What lesson is here for me to learn? Or, you know what, look at, any of our kids that are just killing it right now, that are genuinely being themselves and doing what's right and just making their own. And it's I want that. I want to have that ability to do that. And it's Yeah. Show me. And that's the other thing, too, is we have to be willing to tell our kids, you know what? Mommy lost her temper tonight and I got really angry and I raised my voice and mommy's realizing that it's not your fault. Are you still needing to be accountable for your actions? Yes, but showing our kids that we too are still working on healing ourselves and finding our new rhythm as a whole ourselves and actually taking accountability for our own actions is going to teach them to do the same. And, it actually, Rhea did that the other day, she got really frustrated with her sister, she snapped at her, they got in a big ol fight, ended up both of them getting grounded from their screens it was a huge deal, and then she comes back and she goes, Lyra, I just really need to apologize for you, I had a really rough day at school, and I took it out on you, and I didn't mean to do that, and I'm so sorry, and it's I looked at my husband, and I'm just like, oh my gosh. Because she learned that from

Kristen: 41:03

you.

Tiffany: 41:03

Yeah, exactly. Because I've been owning up to myself and it's really hard to say, you know what, I messed up or, hey, you know what, I probably shouldn't have done this. But the fact that we're able to do that and be that transparent with each other, I think is also going to really build those relationships. So as they continue being older, getting into those more difficult situations, they feel comfortable enough in saying, hey, you know what, mom? I was in this situation. I don't think I handled it the best or I didn't know what to do. Can we talk about it kind of thing. And we have, we expect our kids to be transparent with us and honest with us and, accountable for their actions. But we also need to be accountable for our own actions, which I think is a really hard piece for a lot of people to swallow at first.

Kristen: 41:45

Agreed. All right. So tell us about Aligned and Thriving. Where can people find it? How can they find you? What can you do for them? Give us all the details.

Tiffany: 41:56

Yes. So I'm really excited. I actually launched my first run with Aligned and Thriving January 11th. And I had eight beautiful women that committed to stepping on this 90 day life changing quantum healing journey with me. And I dive into everything. We are going to look at everything from a soul level to a spiritual level, to financial, to physical, to nutritional, mental. I take all of the different wellnesses and the things that make us who we are by design and just. Break it all down. I tear it all down and I basically have women start from scratch and it is one of the most terrifying, the most emotional things that you can go through in your first week of the program. But once again, if you get past that first week, that's where you're going to see those massive shifts and changes. And I've been working with several women who are now losing weight, who are off medication, who are just completely thriving in all aspects of their life. I have one mama who is working really hard to get full custody of her child. And she's actually got herself in a stable position to where she can do that. I have been working with her for a long time, but she's actually been like, this program has helped her really start figuring out what she wants with herself and her family. And she's been doing amazing, but. I was able to lose a hundred pounds and get my entire physical, mental, spiritual self back in order. And this is what I'm doing with the women. And I can only share what I've got because I had to use it myself. And I've been there and I've been through the trenches and I know how hard it is. But if you're wanting those real transformation, this is the way to go. And it's not about forcing yourself into a better routine. It's genuinely about just getting to the root causes of what's been holding you back and actually healing and shifting it on all layers and levels. And so It's not about doing more. It's about doing differently and learning in a way that's going to really support you and living a life of alignment instead of living a life that feels more forced, feels more anxiety, feels more stressed, feels a lot more just not in alignment. And, it's really great. It's super fun. I'm actually getting ready to launch another run of it again in March. And you can find all the information on my website, which is sacred wellness journey. us. And then on the top of mine is going to be a little tab that says Aligned and Thriving, and you can find all the information there. You can also follow me on Facebook. I am on Instagram as Sacred Wellness Journey. I am on TikTok, but I don't really do a whole lot of TikTok videos. That's more for me just to share. But yeah, and you can reach out to me also via Facebook or Facebook Messenger or anything like that.

Kristen: 44:51

That's awesome and I'll put all the details in the description of the episode so you can get straight to Tiffany's site and her Instagram and I'll probably put your email in there too and people can reach out to you whichever way works best for them and You can help us all so we can all just get past surviving and get to thriving and get ourselves aligned to where we need to be in all the areas of our life.

Tiffany: 45:14

Yes, absolutely. And be sure to check out, I have it's not like a freebie tab, but I do have my ebook that has, it's really fun. It's actually one of the ones that I use as a staple. It's free. And it starts just getting you set up for the in depth run of aligned and thriving with some just simple suggestions and tips and things like that. That, I find very helpful, but if you're actually looking to have somebody coach you through those 90 days and really help you in getting to those root causes and to diving deeper into really getting to that spot that just. People tend to really bury down deep inside and forget about them. That's where I come in and that's where this program comes in. And, we do build a very beautiful community of women who are going through the same thing. Which gives you that support system that a lot of women are looking for that's non judgmental. We can be completely raw, open and honest and not even have to think twice about it. It's really fun. It's really, it's a lot of work, but it's definitely worth it. And if you're really looking for those lasting shifts and changes, then this is the way it'd be. It's so much fun. So

Kristen: 46:21

that's awesome. Tiffany, thank you so much for being here. And I don't want to put you on the spot, but I'm going to can I invite you back to come talk again? Cause I feel like there's so much we still need to talk about.

Tiffany: 46:34

Yes, absolutely. And like I said, if you have anything that like, Hey, I've got some followers that were really interested in learning more about this or this let me know. I know you got your podcast and everything going now, but I can always share some fun tips and tricks. And tricks too, if that's something that you're looking for as Hey, I listened to your podcast and this is what I would like to, or I have questions for, I'd like to know more about I can do that as well too.

Kristen: 46:58

Perfect. So you heard it first here, everyone, Tiffany will come back. She'll answer your questions. So make sure you get those in, let us know what else we can talk about Tiffany with. All right. Thanks so much, Tiffany.

Tiffany: 47:10

Absolutely. Thank you guys so much.